8.11.2010

Roy stood up abruptly with a hard look on his face.

"You just pissed in the soup. STOP PISSING IN THE GODDAMN SOUP!"

8.02.2010

Food is the social currency.

6.03.2010

So there I was in the bookstore when this guy wearing a red purse pulls a large medicine bottle and a sock out of the purse. Oh wait, that was me.

1.27.2010

Gridley pulled a flask out of his pocket.

1.15.2010

The chef was arthritic, with one bad eye and one really bad eye.

12.10.2009

50 yards of awesomeness.

11.25.2009

"If they know that..." Roger grasped for words. "That means - they can see us. How can they see us?"

7.06.2009

Ah, how high is the ecstasy of a new discovery.

5.22.2009

Walter insisted that he was able to play the banjo despite having never touched one.

5.07.2009

Morris pulled violently on the pole while the small boat pitched in the open sea. His line snagged in the reel and then broke as the beastly fish pulled him overboard.

4.13.2009

"You're no gentleman!"

He stood, his hands no longer shackled to the oar. The revolt on the galley began this way.

4.09.2009

The laughter of the Kookaburra was infectious.

1.31.2009

The first death is in the wanting.
The second death is in the having.
The third death is in the losing.

10.29.2008

What do you think, Dr. Frankenham-Head?

9.22.2008

"Will there be food?"

"Its a wake, not a buffet."

7.30.2008

"That's real smutty" Rudolph exclaimed in the most condescending way he could.

4.24.2008

Ice cream truck in doppler effect.

4.10.2008

Marlon Brando stars in: Your Lying!

2.28.2008

...playing tequila-shot jenga with Buckminster Fuller.

1.11.2008

Written on the wall in brown marker, it said plainly;

"Hector has no friends."